I told you not to ask me yes or no questions, you incompetent fool. Yes.

Asked on Wednesday August 6, 2008 - 9:57am

Dear Unfriendly Shy Person,

It would be wise to make friends with these so-called "cool" guys before attempting to make yourself overly available to them. But why take the long and arduous approach when a good spell can do the trick? I suggest that you make all the females in your institution look like swine to boost your confidence.

How's that?
Voldemort

Asked on Sunday July 6, 2008 - 2:15pm

Your doubt in your friendship with Stacy reveals what you already know. Confront her yourself before I convince her otherwise.

Asked on Wednesday May 7, 2008 - 6:03pm

Since it's been more than three months since you've asked for my permission... you now have it.

Asked on Friday May 2, 2008 - 2:01pm

Because the multi-colored rainbow spectrum was already taken.

Asked on Friday April 18, 2008 - 10:58am

Dear You,

I'm surprised you even have to ask. This is a once in a life-time opportunity. Here's a girl that will probably do anything to be with you again. Anything. Dare to test those chances.

Truly,
Voldemort

Asked on Tuesday April 1, 2008 - 10:36pm

To the hapless one,

If you want this girl to stop talking about you, then just be the most boring person in the world. Don't do anything. Don't say anything. Don't like anyone. That way, she'll have nothing to talk about. Not everything requires a spell or curse. Now be gone!

The Dark Lord

Asked on Friday February 8, 2008 - 10:26pm

Dear Hunter Girl,

Parents are the source of everyone's problems, which is why I got rid of mine. Each child must deal with their parents in their own way because every household has different conflicts. I dealt with my own to the best of my magical ability. The question is, what is yours?

From,
Voldemort

Asked on Sunday January 27, 2008 - 11:12am

For this clueless one,

Just because you go to dance with someone doesn't mean they are your "significant other." Brew up some love potions to have it be true if you'd like. What do I care? Relationships are but a bitter end to the life of power.

Lord Voldemort

Asked on Sunday January 20, 2008 - 4:03pm

You silly child. No one can every become as powerful as I.

Asked on Friday January 11, 2008 - 7:58pm

Hahahah! *points finger* Hahahah!

Asked on Monday December 31, 2007 - 11:04am

The real dilemma is whether or not you are willing to keep your best friend or her brother. Seems to me that you have already made your choice. You know what you want to do, but wish you didn't want to. You know what you should do, but seek reassurance despite what you already know. The answer is inside you. If you don't make up your mind now, you have lost any possibility in either gaining a boyfriend, losing a friend, or losing both. Choose wisely. It could be your last.

Asked on Tuesday December 25, 2007 - 7:18am

Stop looking into a mirror. Pick up and read a grammar book.

Asked on Friday December 21, 2007 - 10:56am

The part where I switch bodies with that Weasley girl while she dies in my place with my body. Then I ripped out the real epilogue of Harry and Hermione's marriage and rewrote it with a bunch of rubbish involving Harry and Ginny having a family and Ron and Hermione as a couple. You can tell it was me because of those absolutely ridiculous names given to their children. I've tainted the Potter series with the worst piece of epilogue writing in the history of the world. Muahahahah!

Asked on Thursday December 13, 2007 - 2:37pm

So what? I died.

Asked on Sunday December 2, 2007 - 12:26pm